Unwanted Guest

It all started last Spring with a plague of locusts. Well, it wasn't exactly locusts... it was termites. But it was a swarm of insects and let's face it, locusts sound more impressive.

Anyway... last Spring we noticed that we had an uninvited guest. It was that famous dude that all homeowners hate - Murphy. I didn't see all the suitcases, but he must have moved in for an extended visit because it's been a tough 15 months around here. We've had the termite incident. Then there was the day the contractor came to install the egress window in the basement and the wet saw leaked through the bedroom and into the toy room. Then, three weeks before I was leaving for Vietnam, we had a leak in the basement - later attributed to a leaking water main pipe and fixed at our expense because the city only pays for repairs on city property. Niiiice.

That's three things, right? So Murphy should have packed up and moved on to some other home owner. But obviously he's very comfortable here, as evidenced by the horrible metal-on-metal sound coming from my brakes a few months ago that caused me to go into an instant panic and drive straight to my nearest car repair shop. But it had been fairly quiet since then and I was feeling safe. So safe, in fact, that we used some of our precious spare cash to jazz up the homestead.

First up was our living room floor. We had a creamy-colored Berber carpet that had been here since we moved in six years ago and it looked awful. I was embarassed to let people in my house - that's how bad it was. We replaced the carpet in the living room and down the hallway with a cherry wood laminate last Monday, and it looks great! I need a rug for sound absorbtion... but it looks so much better and I've already had a guest come over to celebrate :)

Next was our trees. Our house was built 18 years ago and we have some beautiful mature trees on our lot, but they were starting to get overgrown. I could tell because we could no longer walk off the back deck in an upright fashion. At the end of May, we had a tree trimmer come out to give us an estimate on trimming the trees and then, since he was here, I had him quote the removal of a couple of smaller trees with issues. One was a tree we not-so-affectionately called the Leaning Tree of Pisa. The kids who lived here before us hung on the branches until the tree leaned like a drunken relative at a wedding dance. We tried for ages to get the tree to stand upright but years of alcohol abuse won out. Number two on the list was a small crab apple tree in the front yard that I have hated for 360 days of every year I've lived here. For four days in April, it blooms in the most beautiful pink blossoms and the rest of the year, it just sits there and mocks me with its ugliness. Thankfully, the quote for the tree trimming and tree removal was very reasonable so we scheduled an appointment and I was excited!

ONE WEEK LATER, a storm hit and the wind blew down a gorgeous tree in my front yard that, ironically, wasn't going to be touched by the tree trimmer. Murphy strikes again.

So, we've paid for the floors and we paid for the trees and oh yes, Natalie got glasses last week and we paid for those too. And I was feeling very self-satisfied, because at one point in our lives we would have charged many of those expenses and been paying them off until we were nearing retirement age. But look at us! Financially responsible and able to handle minor household emergencies! I was feeling so self-satisfied that I went out on Saturday morning and bought some cute miniature Spruce trees and spent the afternoon re-landscaping the side of the house since the termite incident had wiped out several perfectly nice bushes.

But Murphy wasn't done with us yet because last night, the microwave died. You can help out by posting your mailing address in the comments section. I have a houseguest I need to get rid of and... ummm... I mean... I've got a present to send you. Priority mail.