The Other Stuff

See how upset I am? I titled the previous blog post 'And other stuff' and didn't even give you any other stuff! There *is* other stuff and we'll get to that in a day or so. But I have been thinking more about WHY I'm so upset about the Vietnam adoption situation. Obviously, as I've already mentioned, this completely and totally sucks for the legitimate orphans who will now sit in orphanages for possibly years with loving nannies who are, nonetheless, not a supplement for a permanent family.

But I'm also incredibly sad because over the last 2 years, I've fallen in love with the country and people of Vietnam. When you adopt a child internationally, you also adopt that country's culture and traditions. You choose to be a steward of the things that your child will lose by living in the good ol' U.S. of A. You read history books and contemporary novels and search out films where subtitles are necessary to understand the plot.

And then you go to the country. And you spend 15 days absorbing the sights and smells and tastes that are YOUR CHILD'S BIRTH COUNTRY. And you know that 15 days is not enough to be able to provide a sense to them of the country where their birth parents and birth grandparents still live.

Before we adopted Phoebe, all I knew about Vietnam was the war, a Robin Williams movie, and that there was a French influence somewhere along the way... and that much I knew because I read a book. Now, Vietnam is so much more. Vietnam has given our family a beautiful gift. Not just a daughter, but an appreciation for her country and her culture. An appreciation for another side of the world we live in - different, not better and not worse.

So I'm sad. I'm incredibly sad that there will be many familes who won't have the opportunity to know Vietnam the way that we do. The beauty, the history, the people... all of which have given us a treasure in our sweet little Phoebe.